Sunday, January 15, 2012

Druid Worgen Shit

So, I started an alliance character. She is now my only character over on that side. I played alliance before, but I never made it past level 20. My first wow character was alliance actually, because my brother played on alliance, deep down I really wanted to be Horde, but whatever. This is what kept me from playing for about 3 more years afterward. I wanted to try it since I heard of the game, probably a while before BC came out, but I hesitated because people were saying its addictive and I have a very addictive personality * takes a drag of a cigarette and a swig of booze* so it was like, "I don't need this kind of crap right now, I'd end up like one of those people that sit there for so long they die from not showering, pissing themselves and not eating." Then I finally tried when my brother asked me to join him, HOWEVER he is not the most reliable person or the best guide, and I, having NO IDEA what the hell I was doing became increasingly frustrated.

I was a Nightelf rogue and in the starting area I was doing fine, then for some reason, he wanted to take me to Ironforge. He brought his 70 Nightelf hunter over to the starting area to lead me there, and I just followed him. I must have died at least 20 times on the way, and at that point graveyards were not everywhere so running back all those times was a bitch and a half. So anyway, I think about halfway there he is just like "OH I GOTTA GO, BYE" and logs. I'm standing in the middle of bum-fucked Egypt surrounded by 20+ mobs, I don't know how to do anything, go anywhere and I keep dying. At this point I'm just like "ALRIGHT, FUCK THIS GAME, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED BUT I HATED ALL OF IT." and it would be another 3 or so years until I tried the game again. This time around I had someone reliable to show me how to do things around Azeroth. I slowly began to see why so many people loved it, and I got to be Horde! yay! I never looked back. 

So, to this day I have never experienced Alliance side. I kind of feel bad because I'm basically missing half of the game. All my friends are Horde-side though, so I always hesitated making an alliance character. Finally, in an insomnia-induced delirium I decided to make an Alliance character a few days ago. I made her a Worgen druid because I've never played a druid, and out of all the Alliance races, Worgen are the most appealing to me. Humans, Gnomes, Elves and Dwarves all bore me. Draenai are alright, but I am actually 40% furry. DON'T YOU JUDGE ME. Besides I'm not the creepy, sexual pervert kind, I just enjoy drawing humaniod animals, they're fun! back to the point - ever since Worgens came out I really wanted one. Here's my beautiful Charmaine:

I really like the catform models for the Worgen, DEM PURP EYES. I was having a lot of fun playing a druid too, it was new and refreshing. I have to say this though. When it comes to Worgen females, my god, what did they do to their FACE? It looks like they had one too many face lifts and are TRYING so desperately to smile but instead just straining and showing their teeth. I wish they looked more wolf-like instead of a busty model that had sex with a chihuahua, resulting in deformed hybrid monster babies. 

I mean her face is all like: 

Another thing I noticed, is the Alliance areas are SO NICE and fantasy-like and pretty compared to the Horde. I was running around Stormwind like "WHAT'S THIS? WHAT'S THIS?! THERE'S SOMETHING GOING WRONG! WHAT'S THIS?! THERE'S PEOPLE SINGING SONGS! WHAT'S THIS! THE STREETS ARE LINED WITH LITTLE PEOPLE LAUGHING(gnomes?) EVERY BODY SEEMS SO HAPPY..." etc. etc. It felt nice to see some god damn green though instead of an endless sea of brownish yellow. No wonder the Horde are so pissed off all the time. To show what I mean I've drawn this completely accurate diagram of how it was for Dreamy today, and then how it was for Charmaine. 

WHAT THE HELL MAN? THEY GOT COWS AND SQUIRRELS THERE....AND I SWEAR TO GOD I SAW A BUTTERFLY. This is bullshit, we got dead raptors stinking up the desert and a bunch of scorpions pinching our asses. Okay...okay, I'm over it.  I have to say the scenery change is nice though. I guess Horde are just more badass like that...yeah, that's why. 

On another note, I'm happy for our guild because last night we ran a full run of ICC 10 heroic and got all the achievements for glory of the Icecrown raider (10) except 1, which we're going back for next week so we can all get our new mounts! I know, you're saying " Who cares? I did that shit 3 years ago." Well fuck you because I have a small ass guild and we take what we can get. 

I love you guys :) Guildies and friends of Rollin with Bob Saget. Shout out to the friends in other guilds 
UP IN SMOKE & Ex Inferius

See you guys again real soon! 

P.s. about those Class drinks - I will be doing DK's this week for a friend and will have it up a bit later this week so stay tuned.


  1. I will never roll a female worgen for that reason. Their faces look like some weird hybrid cat/dog type creature wearing makeup. Add a helm to the mix and it's just all over...

    1. They do! It's even more weird as a druid. I look so badass when I'm in cat form, then I switch back to Worgen and truly see how doofy they look. Since when are kitties more frightening than wolves? Ah well. I've let go of hope that they'll ever fix them. X3

  2. Only way they could ever fix worgens (all of em, male and female) would be to switch them back to the original badass silverpine forest/shadowfang keep style badass werewolves. Now THOSE I'd want to play. The player ones are just all sorts of wrong looking.

  3. The original worgen females had a mystical wolf face. Then people screamed FURRIES and they got the paralyzed chihuahua snarl. But they kept their boobs getting bigger in were form. The original face was sweet they just need to not do things like give em a huge rack. :)

    The PvP comic guy did a WoW comic for a while called 'Ding!' and commented about how nice and wonderful they made the alliance compared to the horde. Though to be fair your comparing a Vanilla zone to a Cata zone. Higher polygon skins in the new stuff and all that.